I was cleaning out my closet when I saw a letter written to me by my father in 2000; he told me that I should study hard so that I will be able to get admission to Medicine and Surgery in the prestigious University of Nigeria Nsukka. After reading that letter, I felt for him and remembered his ordeal with my immediate elder brother who wrote JAMB 3 times for the same course in the same school and yet was not given admission. My brother was so frustrated that he had to buy the next form with his own money, choose Civil Engineering as his preferred course in University of Benin. That year he got admission to study his dream course after waiting so many years trying to fulfill a father’s quest to have a Medical Doctor as a son. Finally none of us studied Medicine and Surgery even after so many years trying to achieve that and now my father has taken comfort in his relatives who are consultants in the medical field.
Now I know a lot of you will say we have disappointed him, but the truth remains that as he didn't create any one of us, he can’t force another man’s destiny upon us. Parents make such mistakes wasting the future of their children in order to fulfill their own desires. Some will tell you, ‘I want you to reach that height I never reached or I want you to study that my dream course for me’. My dear don’t be deceive because though you are of the same blood, you are not of the same character neither will you have the same destiny.
Personally i don't believe that a career can be your destiny, but careers are tools for you to fulfill your destiny, you life is too big to be defined by a Job title, your career/job/vocation are all means to an end not the end.
I feel that parents should be able to direct their children to the right career part after carefully studying the ward. For instance our 4th born started defacing the walls of the house from childhood, with all manner of drawing and calligraphy. My parents did not even bore him with the medicine and surgery talk and concurred when he told them he wanted to study Architecture.
What we should consider:-
Choosing a right career can be difficult but having a defined career direction helps. With little work, planning and some self reflection you will be heading towards a better career.
1. Consider your interest
There is a saying that if you are trying to choose a career, you should think about what you would do if you didn't have to work. Whether you have the means or not; this way you will get a better insight into what you think you should do. Example, if you want to be an actor, you can consider getting a degree in communications or media broadcasting etc
You should also consider your hobbies while making such decisions as many hobbies respond to real world needs. If you like playing volleyball, you can major in that, join a club to enhance your skills and you will definitely go places. You could also consider teaching about sports who knows you might become one of the known coaches in your generation
3. Academic subject
Also put into consideration that subject you look forward to every day you are in school. Academic subjects even though it requires more schooling, translates well into a future career, when pursued with strength and vigor. That is why you must choose carefully so that you don’t go wasting years and having certificate you won’t use.
Nowadays, skilled labour is easier and it is often in demand. Discover that your skills and enhance on it; if you like cooking, you can go to a culinary school and enhance your skills.You can also consider your interpersonal skills, which can help you become a social worker or join a Non Governmental Organization. If you have that passion to help others. You can become a motivational speaker if you know how to communicate and interact well with people.
5. Ask a professional
Some of us don’t recognize the presence of guidance and counselors we have in our schools. We keep drifting and struggling to find ourselves when a meeting with such professionals can help direct us towards a better part.
Some career paths require special schooling which is unnecessarily expensive especially in this country. I know someone that has abandoned law all because he can’t afford the ridiculous amount for Law school. You spend so much, sell your property to pay your tuition for your 5 years in university and then your law school fees is more than the amount you paid for those 5 years (really and truly it saddens my heart). Your ability to pursue your career or change careers may hinge on your financial situation and in this situation I do not know what to say but I pray that the government will create more programs to help her citizens example apprenticeship programs, scholarships, grants etc to help you live your dream.
7. Job stability
This should also be put into consideration as the job market always fluctuates. The society needs different things at different times. So think outside the box and think of that thing that will always be needed at anytime. Nowadays law positions are no longer in demand as last few years; that is why all these politicians are conceding defeat and dashing the hopes of lawyers, lol.
Finally it is not the end of the world if you chose a wrong career, you can change it though it may take more time and work but I suggest you start today.
Thursday, 21 May 2015
This is a popular saying whenever we encounter hoodlums who want to make out with our belongings, they point their weapons at you and then the phrase comes out YOUR MONEY OR YOUR LIFE, most times people quickly give them what they want so that they can live, and the truth is that you probably made the right choice by obeying them. But is that phrase really correct. Your money or your life. Your money in literally term is your life, by giving it away you give out your life. Pause a bit and think with me
Let’s say you want to buy the new Samsung note 4 which is sold around 110,000 Naira, the real number cost of that phone is not 110,000, the real cost is how many days you will work to get that money, therefore the real cost is not in cash but in days therefore in hours or minutes or seconds if you decide to break it down further, then you see yourself reasoning like this;
How Much Is my Hour Worth
If you are like every normal employee you work 9 to 5 everyday, this would amount to 198 hours a month, and you are paid 50,000 (that is the perceived average income in Nigeria for graduates) this implies that you are paid 253 Naira per hour, every month.
Once you've nailed down the rough value of each working hour, you can begin shifting away from thinking Naira to thinking life. You do this by calculating the life cost of all those things you wish you could buy.so back to our Samsung Note 4 which is worth 110,000 naira, if each hour you work is 253 naira then that phone will cost you 439 Hours, which is roughly 10 weeks of your life and this is assuming the phone is the only thing you spend money on for the next 10 weeks.
Consider trading things for life.
Once you've calculated these actual life costs, think seriously about the trade-off between things and life. We always say we want to live life but on a second thought we are not living we are spending our life on things that most times does not matter. Will you consume the greater part of your life on things that matter so little? But if you decide that certain things are worth the life sacrifice, then please go ahead and spend your life on them. This does not make you a bad person though, it just means that you have made a reflective choice to sacrifice a portion of your days and hours for the things you own. You've made a conscious choice. The real danger arises when we lose consciousness of this choice, when we buy without ever considering the amount of life exchanged for our latest purchase.
Truth is that time is one commodity God gave us at creation, the other is talent. Throughout your stay on earth you will always trade your time for things, for moments etc, just don’t lose sight of that when next you pull out your wallet, because you are not just spending your money you are spending your life.
Wednesday, 20 May 2015
I got a call from a friend back then during my university days, actually he’s not my friend just that he knows my brother and in the name of trying to be “big brother” he asked for my phone number which I obliged him with. One morning I got a call from him and after the early morning pleasantries he asked me the Law school I want to attend (as if he’s Director General of the Nigerian Law School). Well, I told him Lagos will definitely be my first choice, Bayelsa and then Abuja as my last. He talked and advised me for 30minutes why Abuja should be my first choice and finally said
“Oy, just send your particulars to me, at least you have free accommodation in my house and it won’t be bad of you cooking for me too”.
For 5 minutes I was speechless and I replied him yes ( as they say, Saying Yes does not cause quarrel). I went back to bed to think about my life that day, me!! Come and live in your house so that I will become your professional cook!!! Oh no professional cook is even better at least they get paid for their services. I call mine SLAVERY…. For goodness sake why will i live with him, (I don’t even want to talk about the daily stress and danger having to transport myself to school every day) only to become his slave in the name of cooking because he won’t just cook or will clean his house etc. This boy obviously does not fear me neither does he have the fear of God o!!! Abeg help me judge this matter ooo!!! I am neither his sister, his cousin, his girlfriend nor did he consider the fact that I am supposed to be in love with my books…only God can judge him.
I still get upset each time I remember this conversation and the worst part is that most ladies indulge in this even in this 21st century. Your parents will send you to school and all because you have that fake lifestyle planned out for yourself, you will prefer being a slave to someone else in order to get the comfort needed and to prove that you run the world. Any girl who does not know where she is coming from, will not go far in life, you don’t have to be abused and enslaved by another being in order to get all the good things of this world. I am also not saying that your background should determine your future.
Fast forward to 2014 Christmas period, I went for a wedding with my cousin and unfortunately for him, his shadow was at the wedding. He pretended not to know me when he saw my cousin and just the slightest chance he got, he decided to lecture me on how I shouldn't keep friends like me cousin. My cousin saw us and asked me how I know him. In fact she didn't even want me to explain when she gave me a download of what he did to her friend who happened to be his girlfriend before they broke up. According to my cousin, he will call her friend and tell her what to cook for him and his friends, the loyal girlfriend will go to the market, prepare the delicious meal, serve them, watch them eat, clear the table and finally do the dishes. Sometimes all the thank you she gets is beating for been disrespectful or complaining unnecessarily.
In summary, all ye big brothers watch your friends that claim to play the role of a big brother to your siblings. Ladies going about “chorring” for one man or the other just for your perceived comfort…hmmmm I pray you think twice because its uncalled for, have a little more value for yourself, you are God's Masterpiece
I know it’s a norm in our society nowadays where a girlfriend officially takes over the role of house-help, mother, sister and wife, even when the dude is yet to make any significant move as regards marrying you. Please ladies we are worth more. All you get is to be used and dumped because all that glitters is not gold. If you feel your calling is to take care of bachelors go and open a Catering and Laundry service at least they will pay you to take care of them (LOL). Respect they say is reciprocal, you should not expect the next person to respect you if you do not respect your self.
Tuesday, 19 May 2015
According to the testifier she was not able to attend church all through last year because of her mother’s illness. Her mother was diagnosed of cervical cancer and most times faints due to excessive bleeding. It got so bad that the last time her blood level dropped to 11% and was given 9 pints of blood at a stretch. By the way if you missed my previous post on cervical cancer you can go back and read up on what it is all about or follow this link
To cut the whole story short, the woman said she never took any medication for it and was only feeding on shredded carrot till she got her healing while seated on the pulpit on the 25th of January 2015. Since that day till now, she has neither bled nor fainted and medical report have also declared her free from that illness.
When I heard that, I had my doubts on how she could only survive eating shredded carrot and no medication at least even if it’s panadol extra. Even though eating carrot was her own personal revelation, I was equally convinced that Carrot could be medicinal especially when it has to do with cancer and that led me to do small research about it.
Carrots are often thought of as the ultimate health food. Carrot I believe was first cultivated in the area now known as Afghanistan thousands of years ago as a small forked purple or yellow root with a woody and bitter flavor, resembling nothing of the carrot we know today.
Before the appearance this modern day orange carrot which was stabilized by Dutch growers in the 17th century, there was Purple, red, yellow and white carrots.
NUTRITIONAL BREAKDOWN OF CARROTS
According to the United States Department of Agriculture, one medium carrot or ½ cup of chopped carrots is considered a serving size. One serving size of carrots provides 25 calories, 6 grams of carbohydrate, 3 grams of sugars and 1 gram of protein.
Carrots are rich in vitamin A.
Carrots are an excellent source of vitamin A, providing 210% of the average adult's needs for the day. They also provide 6% of vitamin C needs, 2% of calcium needs and 2% of iron needs per serving.
It is the antioxidant beta-carotene that gives carrots their bright orange color. Beta-carotene is absorbed in the intestine and converted into vitamin A during digestion.
Carrots also contain fiber, vitamin K, potassium, foliate, manganese, phosphorous, magnesium, vitamin E and zinc.
HEALTH BENEFITS OF CARROTS
This is where it gets interesting because increased intake of antioxidant-rich fruits and vegetables reduce cancer and cardiovascular disease risks, carrots included.
Cancer: A variety of dietary carotenoids have been shown to have anti-cancer effects due to their antioxidant power in reducing free radicals in the body. Researchers have also discovered falcarinol and falcarindiol which they feel cause the anticancer properties.
Falcarinol is a natural pesticide produced by the carrot that protects its roots from fungal diseases. Carrots are one of the only common sources of this compound. A study showed 1/3 lower cancer risk by carrot-eating mice.
Lung Cancer: One study found that current smokers who did not consume carrots had three times the risk of developing lung cancer compared with those who ate carrots more than once a week. So if you know that chain smoker kindly encourage him to try and consume more of carrots in order not to die young.
Colorectal Cancer: Beta-carotene consumption has been shown to have an inverse association with the development of colon cancer in the Japanese population.
Leukemia: Carrot juice extract was shown to kill leukemia cells and inhibit their progression in a 2011 study
Prostate Cancer: Among younger men, diets rich in beta-carotene may play a protective role against prostate cancer, according to a study conducted by the Harvard School of Public Health's Department of Nutrition.
Vision: Carrots are rich in beta-carotene, which is converted into vitamin A in the liver. Vitamin A is transformed in the retina, to rhodopsin, a purple pigment necessary for night vision.
Beta-carotene has also been shown to protect against macular degeneration and senile cataracts. A study found that people who eat the most beta-carotene had 40 percent lower risk of macular degeneration than those who consumed little.
According to Duke ophthalmologist Jill Koury, MD, vitamin A deficiency causes the outer segments of the eye's photoreceptors to deteriorate, damaging normal vision. Correcting vitamin A deficiencies with foods high in beta-carotene will restore vision.
Studies have shown that it is unlikely that most people will experience any significant positive changes in their vision from eating carrots unless they have an existing vitamin A deficiency, which is common in developing countries.
Regulates blood sugar: The antioxidants and phytochemicals in carrots may also help with blood sugar regulation, delay the effects of aging, and improve immune function. The high level of beta-carotene acts as an antioxidant to cell damage done to the body through regular metabolism. It help slows down the aging of cells. Personally I am going to buy one basket to help me delay the effects of aging if it truly works.lol
Prevents heart disease: Studies show that diets high in carotenoids are associated with a lower risk of heart disease. Carrots have not only beta-carotene but also alpha-carotene and lutein.
The regular consumption of carrots also reduces cholesterol levels because the soluble fibers in carrots bind with bile acids.
Protects teeth and gums: Carrots clean your teeth and mouth. They scrape off plaque and food particles just like toothbrushes or toothpaste. Carrots stimulate gums and trigger a lot of saliva, which being alkaline, balances out the acid-forming, cavity-forming bacteria. The minerals in carrots prevent tooth damage.
Cleanses the body: Vitamin A assists the liver in flushing out the toxins from the body. It reduces the bile and fat in the liver. The fibers present in carrots help clean out the colon and hasten waste movement. Mtcheew here I am drinking laxative everyday when Carrot would have done the magic.
Overconsumption of vitamin A can be toxic to humans, but is unlikely to be achieved through diet alone (most vitamin overconsumption occurs by supplementation). Overconsumption of carotene may cause a slight orange tinge in skin color but is not harmful to health.
Vitamin A and antioxidants protects the skin from sun damage. Deficiencies of vitamin A cause dryness to the skin, hair and nails. Vitamin A prevents premature wrinkling, acne, dry skin, pigmentation, blemishes, and uneven skin tone. This must be Dencia’s secret but please don’t quote me o!!!
Even though in all the research i made, i didn't see its benefit specifically for Cervical cancer, i believe cancer is cancer it just a matter of which part of the body affected.
Sources: care2com and medicalnewstoday
Monday, 18 May 2015
I went out for lunch with my friends over the weekend. The three of us sat down, placed our orders and suddenly one of us started her lengthy phone call. 10 minutes passed and almost 30 minutes she was still on the phone as if she works for a telecommunication company or she was there ambassador. I couldn't take it any longer that I had to call her out and told her that it’s so rude to do that when you have company. I felt really bad and just then it dawned on me that I am also not innocent of that crime. I can be engrossed in my phone too and sadly I do that even when I am with my friends. That day I felt the pain my friends go through when I don’t pay attention to them and I am like wow!! How do I start apologizing?
In 2010 during the great IPad lunch and buzz, a reporter asked Steve Jobs if his kids loved the technology, Steve replied that he limited the amount of technology his kids used at home. the extent through which virtual engagement has robbed us of real physical engagement is alarming,
Now on the other hand, that act might not be a voluntary act and over time I have come to realize that there are reasons behind such acts such as:-
Boredom:- I think this is the first reason most of us chose our phones over our physical company, if someone is bored the person finds it more respectful to fiddle with his or her phone rather than walking out on you and telling you how boring you are. but to me that does not really make sense, conversations are born out of two people willing to talk and make the time shared memorable, so next time instead of choosing your phone over your present "BORING" company , try and spice up the conversation.
Evading questions:- have you ever witnessed a situation where you asked someone a question and the next reaction is to pick up their phones and be forming busy? Oh yes we ladies we do that a lot, we have that special grace of channeling attention to our phones in order to avoid answering some questions.
Multi-Tasking - Most people believe they have mastered the act of multi tasking that they can be on the phone and still be in active conversation, stop deluding yourself. Yes you might pick a few details here and there but in general you wont understand the real message behind the conversation, this is because over 90% of human communication is non verbal and you require full concentration to pick this non verbal clues up.
Workaholics:- I am so sorry for you if you keep hanging out with that friend that is a workaholic and it is even worse if it’s your partner because boredom will just kill you. Most of us work every time and everywhere; sometimes it could be that urgent mails that needs your attention or the phone call from your boss etc but even at that I feel we should create time to enjoy our moments with our friends. Yea!! Yea!!! I know you will say your friends don’t pay your bills etc but remember no man is an island and one day you will surely need them.
Lack of Discipline - “You are like a modern day Pavlovian dog who responds to the beck and call of others through the buzz of your phone”. it is a known fact in our time that the first thing people do on waking up is no longer to prayer, or reach out for their loved ones, but it is to check their phones for messages or pings or emails, we are slowly losing control over our impulse to reach for our phone every second. take back control of your life and put it away when you have friends and family around.
Shyness:- some of us are so shy especially when we are with the opposite sex, so instead of looking straight into their eyes we tend to channel that energy to our phones and still try to chip in one or two things in that conversation. before the invention of phones it was either we stare at the ceiling or outside the windows but with our phones handy we use them.
I know when we do this we do not mean to make the other person feel bad but lets be real, over indulging in your phone in the presence of friends and family could be rude, disrespectful and annoying
Like I said I am also guilty and hope to be a better person when next we meet.