Monday, 18 May 2015
It's so RUDE!!!
I went out for lunch with my friends over the weekend. The three of us sat down, placed our orders and suddenly one of us started her lengthy phone call. 10 minutes passed and almost 30 minutes she was still on the phone as if she works for a telecommunication company or she was there ambassador. I couldn't take it any longer that I had to call her out and told her that it’s so rude to do that when you have company. I felt really bad and just then it dawned on me that I am also not innocent of that crime. I can be engrossed in my phone too and sadly I do that even when I am with my friends. That day I felt the pain my friends go through when I don’t pay attention to them and I am like wow!! How do I start apologizing?
In 2010 during the great IPad lunch and buzz, a reporter asked Steve Jobs if his kids loved the technology, Steve replied that he limited the amount of technology his kids used at home. the extent through which virtual engagement has robbed us of real physical engagement is alarming,
Now on the other hand, that act might not be a voluntary act and over time I have come to realize that there are reasons behind such acts such as:-
Boredom:- I think this is the first reason most of us chose our phones over our physical company, if someone is bored the person finds it more respectful to fiddle with his or her phone rather than walking out on you and telling you how boring you are. but to me that does not really make sense, conversations are born out of two people willing to talk and make the time shared memorable, so next time instead of choosing your phone over your present "BORING" company , try and spice up the conversation.
Evading questions:- have you ever witnessed a situation where you asked someone a question and the next reaction is to pick up their phones and be forming busy? Oh yes we ladies we do that a lot, we have that special grace of channeling attention to our phones in order to avoid answering some questions.
Multi-Tasking - Most people believe they have mastered the act of multi tasking that they can be on the phone and still be in active conversation, stop deluding yourself. Yes you might pick a few details here and there but in general you wont understand the real message behind the conversation, this is because over 90% of human communication is non verbal and you require full concentration to pick this non verbal clues up.
Workaholics:- I am so sorry for you if you keep hanging out with that friend that is a workaholic and it is even worse if it’s your partner because boredom will just kill you. Most of us work every time and everywhere; sometimes it could be that urgent mails that needs your attention or the phone call from your boss etc but even at that I feel we should create time to enjoy our moments with our friends. Yea!! Yea!!! I know you will say your friends don’t pay your bills etc but remember no man is an island and one day you will surely need them.
Lack of Discipline - “You are like a modern day Pavlovian dog who responds to the beck and call of others through the buzz of your phone”. it is a known fact in our time that the first thing people do on waking up is no longer to prayer, or reach out for their loved ones, but it is to check their phones for messages or pings or emails, we are slowly losing control over our impulse to reach for our phone every second. take back control of your life and put it away when you have friends and family around.
Shyness:- some of us are so shy especially when we are with the opposite sex, so instead of looking straight into their eyes we tend to channel that energy to our phones and still try to chip in one or two things in that conversation. before the invention of phones it was either we stare at the ceiling or outside the windows but with our phones handy we use them.
I know when we do this we do not mean to make the other person feel bad but lets be real, over indulging in your phone in the presence of friends and family could be rude, disrespectful and annoying
Like I said I am also guilty and hope to be a better person when next we meet.