Wednesday, 24 June 2015


I think the new trend now is the trend of self-improvement, although it is not totally new, but I must say that its fever just got really close to my area this morning.
Self-improvement can be defined as the improvement of one's knowledge, status, or character by one's own efforts….. Dictionary. What I would like for you to highlight in this definition is the word improvement and by one’s own effort.

Most of what I hear in the self-improvement movement is less about being your better self but about changing yourself, which to me is the wrong angle. There is this believe that self-improvement is black and white which I don’t totally agree with.

To me self-improvement is more about fine turning, than changing, more of a metamorphosis than a new birth, just like you can’t turn a black and white TV, into a colored TV, there are some things about yourself, you can’t change but you can only fine tune.

Some people when they put on this glasses of black and white are quick to tell you to stop that, stop this, do that and don’t do that, PLEASE!!!!! give me a break!

When we meet someone sometimes in the name of self-improvement we change the person, and the little energetic person who had the drive and passion to conquer the world has been tamed into a lamb to stay in the barn.

When God created you, he made you in a perfect and wonderful way. You don’t need to change yourself to achieve your purpose, all  you need to do is to develop yourself, not all tress will grow like or be strong like the Iroko tree, some will crow like the bamboo too, so don’t try to change me out of my destiny.

To me self-improvement is being the best version of yourself. It is a never ending pursuit to be a better friend, a better sister, a better lawyer, a better wife and mom in the future, it’s a journey we are all on, yes our efforts won’t be the same but as long as we have started on the right part please don’t kill us or discourage us with those words “ why are you ALWAYS like this” “you NEVER change” you are not in my future so how will you know I will never change, and are you not my shadow to know I am always like this.

I am not saying I won’t work on my short comings, I am just saying I would work on them to be the best version of me not the version you want me to be.
I am not where I want to be but I am sure I have left who I use to be, so in the middle am allowed to sometimes slip and fall back into my old ways, don’t give up just yet, I am a work in progress.

I might not have the body of kim Khadrashan but I will do my best to have the best Body God gave me
I might not have the strength of Serena Williams but I will be strong enough to be the woman God made me to be
I might not have the wits and grit of Chancellor Angela Merkel but I would have the wits and grit to fulfill my purpose

I am working on being the best version of myself not a copy of anyone.
So if you’re in a relationship, or a mother , or a sibling, or a Mentor please since you have not seen their future , that perfect person God created them to be, don’t change them into a version of who you want them to be.

The more I grow, the more I realize there is so much out there I don’t know, so much that I have to learn. For sure, there is always something about ourselves we can improve on. The human potential is limitless, so it’s impossible to reach a point of no growth. Whenever we think we are good, we can be even better.
We are all a work in progress.


  1. Self improvement should really be about being a better version of myself.. It hurts when people around me are trying so hard to push me to become just like themselves..

    Thanks for this sis.

    1. Guess your influence is working...*Hugs*

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